Why do I keep returning to this place? I have no one else to blame, except myself. I let you in and got played for a fool again.
You are my kryptonite, or so you think.
I cannot believe all of the bullshit you fed me.
Wow, you really should be a spy with a lie, so well perfected.
No more, To hell with you!
I cannot sit here and say I've been strong when I know different.
But you know the difference between me and you?
I can change and be a better me. You, however, will stay the exact same.
How do I know?
Who've you started telling your lie to now?
I know I'm a faded memory, not even worth a second thought. Next time, don't say we're friends. But I know that's how you make your lie believable.
No more! I'm not your doormat, second choice, your person to call when you got nothing better to do.
No more! How could you have done this to me?
Didn't you care at all?
Do you realize I got this way from your example!?!
Now, I have to fight twice as hard to stay away!
How dare you not take any blame!
I forgive you,
Cuz, it's what I do,
But I cannot, and will not, forget!
Cuz, now, I have to struggle and fight, while you just sit there.
Don't be proud! Don't even like this.
Now, I am able to figure out me and become a better woman because of it.
Even single, I will be happier being the real me, than a shell of the person I could have been.
~ Shanti Marie
9/17/14